Download PDF Downsizing The Family Home What to Save What to Let Go Downsizing the Home Marni Jameson Mark Brunetz 9781454916338 Books

Product details Series Downsizing the Home (Book 1) Paperback 256 pages Publisher Sterling (January 5, 2016) Language English ISBN-10 1454916338

Downsizing The Family Home What to Save What to Let Go Downsizing the Home Marni Jameson Mark Brunetz 9781454916338 Books Reviews

• I'm not generally a fan of surprises; I've planned my life around avoiding the unexpected. These past few days, I've had a pleasant surprise, which has me pondering whether my tendency to a closed mindset is something to tackle in the upcoming year. I've been dreading a huge impending burden, knowing that it should not be my burden, but that it eventually will be, so I gathered my courage and started accepting the truth. My in-laws moved into assisted living over a year ago. They did so reluctantly, and have yet to embrace the permanence of this move. They are currently in their third residence since, due to a combination of restlessness and some behavioral issues that are long-standing and probably fixed. Not "fixed" in the repaired way, but "fixed" in the permanent way.
  Left behind are two homes, both fully furnished, one with a lifetime of memories, collections, and household items. The stacks of mail are still there, in their slit-opened envelopes. The magazines are still stacked, complete with the blown in subscription cards which seem to multiply in the dark. Who is going to deal with this? When? There are three grown sons, each with his own new family and full household. Each is a busy professional and none are happy with the seemingly sudden aging of their parents into a dependent state that is far more desperate than graceful.
  I know without reservation that the emptying of the primary home would not be a task embraced by any of these three sons. I know also that the one son who has the temperament to handle the giant project has used all his patience and forbearance on the day-to-day management of the needs of his parents. If the burden of this house is ever going to be lifted from the family shoulders, and if its value is ever to be contributed to the care and feeding of its former occupants, the process of doing so would fall to me.
  Fully aware of the irony inherent in purchasing three books on downsizing, I wasn't able to discern from the reviews and blurbs which was the one book to answer my need. I ordered all of them on and did nothing other than post a photo of them to my instagram account inviting my acquaintances to enjoy the irony. I set the books aside, thinking I'd done enough for now.
  I brought the least daunting of the three books with me to a medical conference, knowing that the subject matter would seem less daunting in an environment of intense learning. I read the introduction and was stricken by not only how practical this book is, but how thoughtful and kind. I expected practicality from a publication from the AARP, but never knew that the advice I'd find would be so respectfully and pleasantly presented. Liquidating a family's memories and treasures is never a happy task. I didn't think I'd get my husband and his brothers to consider reading on the subject, but I will enthusiastically offer to give them copies of this book. My hope is that we can tackle this project with love for one another and respect for the lives their parents have created. That this simple-appearing book offers solutions and advice to that end, is something that has surprised me in the best of ways!
• Gosh, could I really be the one fortunate enough to be the first reviewer? I've read Marni's columns in The Denver Post for years and have laughed and ached with her along the way as she elegantly handled major life change after major life change. Last night I watched a retrospective about Erma Bombeck on PBS and realized that both these women, Erma and Marni, have amused, inspired and informed me iwith their sly, humorous wisdom.
  
  This book will help people. And it will entertain while doing so. I say this as the veteran of several grueling downsizings and clean outs for parents and in-laws. That was some of the hardest (physically) and most wrenching (emotionally and financially) work of my 71 years. I needed but could not at that time find the emotional support and clarity this little book offers. Further, I'm now clear in my determination not to saddle our own children with a house packed to the gills with our "treasures." Yes, Marni, I get it and a big thank you for giving me new courage and tools to tackle this challenge.
• This is GREAT! Marni, in addition to very thorough guidelines for downsizing, includes recognizing that this may be a very emotional process. I am one who remembers where, when & how we brought items to our home; who has at least 30 Mother's Day, birthday cards, etc.(I know, I just went through them last week & pitched a few). I have seen books & a PBS decluttering show that rather insensitively toss objects that held sentimental value. Not this book! I needed this understanding hand holding. We are older baby boomers, trying to downsize. We, like many of our peers recognize our children really would rather not have most of our stuff.. Yet, they are our memories!! This book is PERFECT for me. I have begun walking around our house with a fresh eye on minimizing all the things we have, yet with a heavy heart. And Marni, in her writing style assures me I am not alone. Very refreshing.
• I had been waiting for this book and following Marni's columns. I promise this is a book you can't put down, so my husband noticed. We are in our 80's and having been through dismantling our parents homes when they passed, we did not want this to happen to our children. My husband and I both have boxes that came home with us from our parents lives that we need to open and take a long hard look at what was their stories and what is ours. This book helped me to change my mind about our 63 year collection, which is our stories and not necessarily theirs.
  I finished the book, handed it to my husband and said, "it's now your turn". We are NOW in the process of seriously downsizing. My husband and I are now on the "same page" and our children know what we are doing and are supportive.
  Please, if you have too much stuff read this book to help you understand how to be free from all the trappings. No matter what your age it's a must read.
  Thank you Marni for setting it straight for us that didn't know where to start.
• There is no magic formula for completing a tough task! Two important messages are stuff isn't worth as much as we think it is AND what is valuable to you is probably not valuable to someone else. The best part of this publication is getting one motivated to dive into a tough job and accepting the reality of it.
• Haven't finished the book, but it opened my eyes to a few misconceptions I had about my, um, stuff. Now I find it easier to declutter. I don't want my sons having to go through all my junk at the end of my lifetime, shaking their heads and wondering why I kept the silliest things. My house is breathing better already, and I feel lighter each time I send clutter off to a new home at the thrift store. Great book, well written.